poetry

He pried my mouth open with his eyes. And right before it all spilled out, I took a deep breath, preparing myself for certain death. 

~ zara taylor

i want to say something relevant...

that moves you and shocks you into openness

surprising even yourself in it's magnitude and brilliance

i want to write it for myself

to wake up

but i cannot

and all my poetry 

to ink your skin with my skin

has become my undoing

filling the most pregnant of thoughts with too many words

spilling into the sort of mess you can't undo

I remember the girl

Who set fire to curtains with candles

It was all about mood lighting

Back when 

Every face was a poem

And I studied each line

With the curve of my spine

​

My heart like a child's 

I was living inspired

And the world was just waiting

For me to arrive

I remember the time

When my mind was so open

And I was just hoping he'd be the one

Then my body turned numb

From all of the lovers that robbed me

Stealing poetry ripe from my body

Line after line 

With every curve of my spine

A part of me died 

Now I'm letting you go

Take my youth

And all of the beautiful words that I gave you

Now I'm letting you know

I'm at a loss

But I'm grateful I no longer crave you

​

The thought of you is a dream

that I can't touch

I almost had you once

To lose you twice is too much

There's nothing more real than the feelings I feel when I hear you open up

The joy is surreal when I let myself steal a moment of your lust

And I'm trying to decipher the road from the path

One is lower and darker

And one's light brings me back

Now I'm older and stronger

But I'm still an empath

You're the wood

Im the water

More like a sponge bath

I just want to soak you

Sink through you

And watch you expand

Coming back to me harder

And softer and wiser

Through the lines of your hands

We will float on the level

More than once and a while

We will flow back to shore with the rock of my thighs

And you'll kiss the land

And I'll touch the sky

If only I could reach you

In this dream of mine

I wish I could write you a poem

Something you never heard before

But all I want to do

Is escape into your swimming silence

Entwine my naked self

With your breathing skin

And rest there

Knowing in the morning

Your alarm will wake me

Softly into the world

By your striving eyes

Wanting more.

My roots are naked
My flesh is ripe
I’m opening daily
Delivering at night
So if you’re ordering inside
Your fortune’s looking bright
I’m expanding on levels
Far out of sight
But I’ve never wanted to be seen
Like I do
Right now
Cause vulnerability IS POWER
And I’ve unveiled a flower
Pulled back the layers
Let’s manifest
Like a prayer
Rewrite the stars
Let’s get super charged
Stand by our hearts
You can lean on me
Reaching to be free
Cause I’m steadily unstable
And I plan to break the table
This box
Has been reshaped
Cause I wrote the mix tape
And I’m dancing
All
Over
It
Cause I am
So
Over
It
I wanna scream
With love
I wanna scream
In frustration
But it doesn’t have to be a
Bad thing
Or some out of reach temptation
Cause we can make it a
Transcendent kinda thing
Where we change a nation
From the rage
We grow up
And own up
To the mistakes we’ve made
Cause when you plant roots in a dirty mess
And grow the shit out of your self
It’s called being BLESSED
And I’m watering this garden
Completely obsessed
Gratitude alone will grow this
Watch me
Bloom
Even my roots
Can change
With the temperatures
And it’s getting hot in here
So I ask
You
How about we plant a garden?
One by one
Cause I’m just getting started
Love

your rhythm gets me in
to the pockets of your skin
and i'm thinking
there's a thin
line between fucking yourself
and a night on the town
cause i'm going down
to the center of my chest
to find that smoke was left
from the last time you shot me
and without rest
my love lingers
down those dark streets
of our memories
as you sink in
to meet me
for one last cup of coffee

Oh, wondrous life long brilliant affections, how sweet she moves me unto tomorrow

To rise again in all this openness

Oh, the humility, our bodies burning and not our own

It seems fate, we are mortals and have nothing, nothing!

We are not owners, but drivers

Crashing frames of destiny, full belly and heart, beating to the drum of time...

Where are we going? What more can I leave behind? But the "I" and this day, but a day!

Oh, wondrous day, this breath, to be!

Crafted by magic

Forgiveness and compassion

Two soulmates determined

You were meant to happen

Like a light in my heart

You turned off the dark

With visions of love

A dream soon to come

Born from the healing

A second chance revealing

True love had a path

And found it’s way back

You are the gift

The seed of believing

With hope comes new life

Living and breathing

Worthiness

Is not a gift

We’re born with it...

I wish I could go back in time

I wish that I could press rewind

To love myself

To love myself

These are my
fallen lips
for they have licked the skin of lies
and kissed the eyes
of men I never loved

These are my
guilty tears
for they have filled my heart with blame
so sharp they stabbed
the child I used to love

I danced with the words
for years I heard
Never the same
Never to escape
Your prison
Your punishment
Of imperfections

The lies that made the mask
These eyes that lie in glass
My hair and ribbons

Unlock my bones
for all the old
is caged inside them

And I will die without new blood
and I will die
Without self-love

Your voice is a lighthouse

Your arms like a harbor

That once housed my skin

To safety you call me

Words, rocking me softly

"Love, come back in"

I've been floating alone

On an ocean so cold

Losing sight of the sun

I stopped believing in one

Till I heard your song

And remembered my own

Your warmth lit the path

Started leading me back

To life on an island

You're every symbol of this

The beauty, the depth, the dynamics

The kiss

Made up of a mouthful

Of silence

Of bliss

Home is where you are

So deeply I miss

And now that you've woken me

Back to my truth

I will thank you forever

For just being YOU!

When you saw me naked for the first time
and it redefined the look in your eyes

like I just blew your mind

When the touch of our lips
felt like jumping off a cliff 

It was so fucking freaky

When falling was just another word for flying

You fell for me

Knowing that newness would turn into a memory

You asked "Will You Marry Me"

​

I was taught the hard way

That I was born a dreamer

Life showed me it was dangerous

To live as a believer

Still somewhere in my heart of hearts

I've never given up

Still wishing on that fairytale 

Someday when I grow up

My soul still dances when I walk

So that I know I'll never stop

Dreaming of the perfect love

That tastes of wine 

And lights me up 

Call me a fool or call me brave

I'm not always sure 

It depends on the day

But I rather live a life half full

Than fear and regret I never dreamed at all

 ©2019 Photo by Michelle Chamberlin